Another donation but a bit discouraged.

Just as I was starting to get discouraged I got another donation to Team in Training.
This whole fund raising thing is a bit daunting. On the one hand I want to raise money for the Leukemia Lymphoma Society. But I don't want to pressure people.  My friends at Team in Training say this should be easy because of my amazing story. I haven't really hooked up with the people Im going to be training with for the Half Marathon. So I will wait and see what I learn from them.
Im realizing that last week I was getting just a little manic over Team In Training. As a lot of you know, Im bipolar.  It has been very well controlled through medicine and therapy. I have learned to recognize when Im getting a bit too happy and excited.  That's what was happening last week.  There are just so many life events coming together that make me happy. All of them completely valid. 
Such as:
1) Being cancer free for almost 6 months
2) Finished with chemotherapy since March 1
3)Successful Gall Bladder surgery
4) My beautiful grandson Oliver
5) Meeting the people in Team in Training and being influenced by their infectious enthusiasm.


All of this is having an effect on my mood. Now you might think that it can't be all that bad to have so many positive life events. And of course it isn't. But it can become a problem if I allow my mood to balloon into euphoria. That's what starting to happen. Fortunately I realized it before I got too high.
When you have Bipolar disorder, what goes up, must come down. The pendulum swings both ways. However high I get will be followed by a matching depression 
That is what Im experiencing now. However, Im not a helpless victim of this. It killed Michael. But I won't allow it to rob me of my beautiful life.  It helps to put those depressed thoughts into words, instead of just letting those vague feelings rattle around in my head. Here they are:
1) Money not coming in to my Team in Training fundraising
2) Even though my hair is starting to come in, Im still essentially bald. When I look in the mirror, I feel bad.

3) Weight loss is stalled at 159.5. Even though I have been religiously tracking my food intake and have upped my exercise, I haven't lost a pound in about 3 weeks. A few days ago I went down to 158.5. But it's back up again.
So, yes Im a bit depressed right now. But I will move back to middle in a little while. In the mean time, Im putting Team in Training on the back burner. And just enjoying each simple moment that makes a day for me.
Life shouldn't be about pressure to do something or stress when it isn't going well. In the long run, Im going to do what is best for me.  Whatever follows will be perfect.