Biopsy today

Friday October 28, 2011
I was awake in the night thinking thinking thinking. The good thing I wasn't thinking scary thoughts. I have been feeling pretty balanced in spite of the grave diagnosis. 
I finally went back to sleep and slept until 5:30. 
This afternoon I will go in to Scripps Green for the biopsy.
It has been less than 24 hours since I learned that I may have cancer. The amazing thing is that Im not overwhelmed with fear. I feel a tenderness for my body. I love my body, even though it isn't well. I talk to my body lovingly and tell it I will take care of it. I don't yet know what the future holds. How can anyone ever know? I just know I am safe. No matter what happens, I am safe. Im going to relax and trust all those who have gathered around me and will take care of me through this adventure.  I know I am loved by family and friends. I will allow that love to surround me, embrace me, carry me. 
I want to be sure Frank is cared for through this. He is full of bravado. He says he will take care of me no matter what. That might be a very tall order. I want him to have some semblance of a normal life.  Im sure my friends and family will step up to the plate and give him time to himself.
The other big concern I have is Katie. I  wish she could count on me during her pregnancy and when the baby is born. I may have to ask others in our lives to step in.  That can't be helped.
This is the day I am living. So I will think about those things on another day. 
'I will think about that tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day' Scarlet O'Hara