Home sweet home

Out of the muck of Sacramento, into the sunshine in San Diego. Its pushing 80 here. Kitties and doggies are in their usual places lolling around on my bed and the floor.
All seems right with the world. As long as I stay in the moment. The future, not so good. On Monday I will have a procedure called a trans esophageal  echo cardiogram. It seems the cardiologist thinks he saw something on the regular echo cardiogram and wants to get a better look. This will involve the usual preparation, nothing by mouth after midnight, arrive at 1:30, prepare for the procedure, get anesthetic, have the thing stuck down my throat through my esophagus all the way down to my heart. Have a look see.  Pull it out, wait for me to wake up. send me home. The next morning, back to Scripps for chemo. It isn't looking like a fun week.  Im a little more apprehensive about this latest procedure. There are more possibilities for screw ups.
It takes a lot of faith to be a patient, (And a lot of patience. (pun intended) and allow people to poke and prod my body, put instruments here and there, stick needles and put highly toxic chemicals into me.
What the heck.. what choice to I have??
Maybe I should try meditating, or crying, or laughing or loosing myself in some mindless activity, maybe a movie, maybe go for a very long very fast walk, maybe the gym.
No matter what I do, Monday is going to come.